Divorce isn't always a level playing field.
While many couples part ways with civility, others face a far messier situation—where one person tries to tip the scales using underhanded divorce tactics.
These so-called sneaky divorce tactics can skew finances, twist parenting arrangements, and drag proceedings into a legal quagmire.
It's not just about being sneaky—it's about calculated moves, like secret divorce strategies used to hide money, stonewall negotiations, or even manipulate parenting plans.
And the fallout?
It can be devastating for the other spouse, emotionally, financially, and legally.
That's why being able to spot these behaviours early is so critical.
It gives you a chance to push back, set boundaries, and level the playing field.
At Unified Lawyers, we don't just understand the playbook—we've seen it all. Our team of divorce lawyers stand firm against unfair divorce strategies, giving you the legal firepower to protect what matters most.
What Are Sneaky Divorce Tactics?
Sneaky divorce tactics refer to unethical, and sometimes unlawful, strategies used by one spouse to undermine the other during a separation or divorce.
These tactics often aim to distort the truth, conceal financial realities, or manipulate child custody arrangements to gain an upper hand.
Common examples include :
- How to hide assets in divorce, including undervaluing property or failing to disclose income
- Misrepresenting income or debts
- Delaying proceedings intentionally
- Alienating children from the other parent
- Misusing legal protections or making false claims
Although such strategies may seem beneficial in the short term to the instigator, they often lead to severe legal repercussions and can harm the instigator's standing in court.
In a notable case (J & R [2023]), a husband was found to have concealed a portfolio of overseas properties. When these were revealed by a forensic audit, the court issued adverse cost orders and adjusted the property settlement to compensate the wife for the deception.
Common Tactics to Watch Out For
1. Tricks in Divorce Settlements
This includes tactics like misreporting assets, undervaluing business interests, or manipulating debt obligations. These tricks in divorce settlements can unfairly skew outcomes.
2. Using Delay or Obstruction
Deliberately delaying responses, repeatedly changing legal representation, or lodging frivolous applications can draw out proceedings.
This strategy is often used to wear down the other spouse financially or emotionally, pushing them towards a hasty or unfavourable settlement.
3. Manipulating Child Custody
Tactics may include making unsubstantiated claims about abuse, coaching children to express a preference, or scheduling activities during the other parent's visitation time.
These behaviours can not only disrupt the child's wellbeing but also damage parental relationships.
4. Sudden Asset Transfers or Debts
In the lead-up to separation, some individuals make sudden purchases, incur debts under joint names, or transfer ownership of key assets to other parties.
These activities can reduce the net asset pool and complicate the division process.
5. Over-involving New Partners
While moving on is normal, involving a new partner too soon in co-parenting roles, or using them to exert pressure during negotiations, can destabilise the post-separation environment and inflame tensions.
Legal and Ethical Implications
In Australia, there's no grey area when it comes to disclosure in divorce.
Under the Family Law Act 1975, both parties are legally obliged to lay their financial cards on the table—completely and honestly.
Try to fudge the numbers, hide a bank account, or "forget" a trust fund, and you're risking more than just a slap on the wrist.
Courts can and do impose serious penalties for non-disclosure.
We're talking adverse costs orders, thrown-out settlements, a shredded reputation in front of the judge, and in some cases, contempt of court findings.
Parenting orders can also tighten up if the deception affects your credibility.
Australian judges don't just disapprove of deceit—they actively punish it.
The legal system is built on fairness, and anyone trying to game that system tends to come off second-best.
At Unified Lawyers, we've tackled countless cases involving manipulative divorce tactics—whether it was buried assets, phantom debts, or a dodgy business valuation.
Our team brings in forensic experts, digs into the details, and holds the other side accountable. Because in our books, fairness isn't optional—it's essential.
How to Protect Yourself
1. Seek Early Legal Advice
Engaging a family lawyer at the outset allows you to understand your legal standing and build a proactive strategy.
Early advice can help you identify and prepare for possible manipulative behaviours.
2. Gather Financial Evidence
Collect and securely store financial documents such as bank statements, payslips, tax returns, superannuation reports, and property valuations.
Photographic evidence and digital backups can also support your claims.
3. Document Concerns
Keep a contemporaneous record of any troubling interactions or inconsistencies.
This might include logging changes in income, sudden withdrawals, or suspicious behaviour involving children.
4. Consider Interim Orders
If there's a risk of harm—emotional, financial, or otherwise—you can apply for interim orders through the court.
These orders can establish temporary parenting arrangements, restrain asset disposal, or secure financial support.
5. Checklist : Red Flags in Divorce Proceedings
- Large, unexplained cash withdrawals
- Sudden resignation or employment changes
- Missing or incomplete financial records
- Refusal to communicate via traceable methods
- Frequent reference to "loans" or "gifts" to relatives
- Involvement of third parties in shared decisions
Stay Informed and Observant
1. Monitor for Sudden Changes
Keep a close eye on any unexpected shifts in your partner's behaviour—especially when it comes to finances or daily routines.
A sudden dip in household income, lavish spending without explanation, or a new wave of secrecy around financial matters can all be red flags.
If they're overly generous out of the blue, or suddenly controlling about money or parenting schedules, there might be more going on beneath the surface. These subtle changes can be strategic—not spontaneous.
2. Trust but Verify
Even if things seem amicable, it's smart to cross-check what you're told.
If your spouse provides bank statements, property valuations, or other financial data, don't just take it at face value.
Run it past your lawyer or a financial adviser. Engage an accountant if necessary.
A bit of early scrutiny now could save you from a major shock down the track—especially if assets have been shifted, undervalued, or deliberately concealed.
3. Use Secure Communication
Avoid using shared devices or email accounts for sensitive discussions. Set up private, password-protected accounts and consider using encrypted messaging apps for additional security.
If you feel unsafe or suspect coercive control, reach out to trusted support networks and services like 1800RESPECT or Legal Aid in your state. Safety planning and protective legal measures can be essential.
The content of this article is intended to provide a general guide to the subject matter. Specialist advice should be sought about your specific circumstances.
