Can I Take My Child Abroad After Divorce?

Now that the long summer break is over and families are back in school-time routine, many separated parents are already thinking ahead. There's half term on the horizon. Christmas plans are beginning to form. Maybe there's talk of a spring visit to see grandparents abroad. But when you no longer live with your child's other parent, and emotions are still running high, it's not always easy to know what you're allowed to do.

Can you take your child abroad without asking your ex? What happens if they say no? And what if there's a history of conflict, or even abuse? These questions come up more often than you might think, especially as holidays become a sensitive flashpoint in the aftermath of divorce or separation. And while some families manage to navigate the process amicably, others find themselves stuck between what they want to do for their children and what the law allows.

You can't just 'go'

One of the most common misconceptions among separated parents is that if you're the one your child lives with most of the time, you can just book a holiday and take them abroad. But unless you've got a very specific kind of court order, that's not how the law sees it.

If both parents have parental responsibility, which is usually the case if both are on the birth certificate, then you'll need the other parent's permission to take your child overseas. Even if it's just for a long weekend. Even if you're paying for everything. Without their agreement, or a court order authorising the trip, you could technically be committing child abduction under the 1984 Act.

That might sound dramatic, but we've seen it happen. People assume the rules won't apply to them, or that because the child lives with them most of the time, they can make those decisions alone. But the law treats international travel differently. Once you're across a border, enforcement becomes more complex, and potentially more urgent.

In practice, consent is easy. It just means securing simple letter of consent from any other individual with parental responsibility, which should include the other parent's full name, signature, and contact details, the travel dates and destination, and a clear statement of their agreement to the trip.

The 28-Day Exception

There's an exception that occasionally applies. If you have a child arrangements order that says the child "lives with" you, then you're generally allowed to take them abroad for up to 28 days without the other parent's consent. It sounds straightforward, but it's rarely a good idea to do it without any communication.

Just because something is technically allowed doesn't mean it won't cause problems later. In our experience, parents who act unilaterally, even when the law's on their side, often end up dealing with backlash, whether that's in court or in their ongoing co-parenting relationship. Giving the other parent advance notice, talking things through, and showing transparency can go a long way in avoiding future disputes.

If the other parent says no

This is where things often start to unravel. Maybe the other parent doesn't want to agree because they're worried about the destination. Maybe they're still hurt about the separation. Or maybe they just want more control than they're legally entitled to. Whatever the reason, you don't have to abandon the trip altogether. But you do have to go through the right channels.

If the other parent won't give permission, you can apply to court for what's called a Specific Issue Order. Essentially, it's a way of asking the court to decide for you. You explain the details of the trip, such as where you're going, why, how long for, and the court will weigh that against any concerns the other parent has raised. As with most family law decisions, the guiding principle is what's in the best interests of the child. Not what's convenient for you. Not what feels fair to the other parent. The court wants to know: is this trip going to benefit the child?

Timing matters. If you're hoping to get away for Christmas or even half term, don't wait until October to start the process. These applications take time, and leaving it late can reduce your options.

When things are more complicated than they seem

Not all disagreements over travel are about logistics. In some families, there's a deeper story behind the tension – particularly if there's a history of domestic abuse or coercive control. Maybe the other parent has used threats in the past. Maybe the child is anxious about going abroad with them. Maybe court orders are already in place to manage contact safely.

In those situations, the conversation around permission becomes much more delicate. If a non-molestation order or prohibited steps order is already in place, or if one parent's access is limited, the court may take a different approach. The focus shifts from shared decision-making to safeguarding. In some cases, where risk is high and evidence is strong, the court may support overseas travel without the other parent's input, or even consider international relocation.

Every case is different. And in cases involving serious concerns, getting specialist legal advice early is absolutely essential.

Avoiding holiday warfare

We've worked with families where the holidays become a battleground. One parent blocks every proposed trip, just to make life harder. The other starts keeping plans secret, convinced they'll be vetoed no matter what. Before long, the whole idea of a family break becomes tainted by mistrust and frustration.

It doesn't have to be that way. Sometimes, with a bit of outside help, parents can get back to a place of co-operation – or at least reach a truce. Mediation can help, especially if you've got recurring disagreements. And in some cases, it makes sense to build a clear holiday clause into your parenting plan or court order that sets out what's allowed, how much notice is needed, and who covers what.

When there's clarity on both sides, there's usually less conflict. Not none, but less.

Thinking ahead makes all the difference

If you're hoping to go abroad with your child, even just for a few days, it's worth planning early. Think through the logistics, talk to the other parent if possible, and get advice if you're unsure what your rights are. And if you anticipate pushback, don't wait. The courts can't grant orders overnight, especially during busy periods.

Travel shouldn't be a minefield. But for separated parents, it often is. Emotions linger. Power dynamics surface. Old wounds get poked. And amidst all that, there's a child who probably just wants to go on holiday and feel relaxed.

At Buckles, we help families untangle these issues every day. Whether you're trying to get permission for a trip, dealing with an obstructive co-parent, or worried about your child travelling overseas, we can walk you through the legal options, and help you find a solution that keeps your child's best interests front and centre.

The content of this article is intended to provide a general guide to the subject matter. Specialist advice should be sought about your specific circumstances.