My grandfather passed away when I was 15 years old. For the last three years, he had suffered from dementia. He was once refined like an honorable seonbi, a traditional Korean scholar full of virtue, so it was heartbreaking to see him gradually losing himself to dementia. I remember him sitting in front of a piece of paper with his hands frozen in mid-air, devastated, unable to recall words he used to write effortlessly. Perhaps that was when he realized that he had fallen into an abyss that would steadily consume his memory. That he would encounter such situations more often.  

Working as a lawyer, I have participated in several cases sparked by dementia. In many of those cases, adult children were already engaged in inheritance disputes. The most typical situation involved the adult children claiming an adjudication on the commencement of adult guardianship of their parent with dementia and pressuring the appointed adult guardian to claim for invalidity of gifts, or claiming for invalidity of gifts first and claiming an adjudication on commencement of adult guardianship. Some were dissatisfied with their parent's decision to give all their properties to their sibling. Some were outraged as they discovered that their sibling had brought their demented parent to banks to withdraw money. Some were looking for their demented parent after their sibling had placed them in a distant nursing home and refused to share its location. Various people seek litigation for various reasons.

However, it is not easy to overturn a decision that was made before the commencement of adult guardianship. The children have to demonstrate that their parents were devoid of the mental capacity to make decisions at the time of the decision. Mental capacity to make decisions refers to the mental ability or intelligence to reasonably judge the meaning or result of one's action on the basis of normal perception and thinking ability, which should be determined individually in relation to a specific juristic action (see Supreme Court Decision 2008Da58367, Decided on January 15, 2009). A diagnosis of dementia is not enough to prove the absence of such mental capacity. They have to prove that their parent lacked the mental ability to the extent of not being able to understand the meaning of signing a gift contract at the time of making gifts. Most people choose to apply for a psychiatric evaluation, which examines the mental ability at the time of the legal action based on past medical records or pictures used as judgment data. However, as dementia symptoms deteriorate gradually over time, fluctuating between getting better and worse on a daily basis, the result of such evaluations depends on what kind of medical records or pictures are used at the time of making gifts. These kinds of litigations are not easy for litigation representatives. Litigations between family members often develop into emotional disputes. I often try to persuade clients not to fight over matters that are legally meaningless, but they seldom listen. If the counterparts' written statement contains facts that vary from the actual facts or any statements that blame the client, they must be refuted. In one case, I also raised my voice in front of the judge, sympathizing with my client. Despite the fact that it was not the main legal issue in that case—the father's mental capacity to make decisions at the time of making gifts—I claimed that the counterparty's spouse had no right to receive any gift from the client's parent since she did not attend the funeral of her mother-in-law. The dispute was discontinued by the judge, but I still find it satisfying that I won the case. Aside from that, I started wondering what those parents would think. What would they think if they found out their children were arguing over their health and property? What would they regret?

I recently participated in a research study to develop strategies for protecting senior financial consumers commissioned by the Financial Supervisory Service. The research determined what measures other countries took to protect their senior financial consumers and their applicability to Korea. Aging accompanies a decline in physical function, a fall in adaptability and cognitive capacity, and a change in personality behaviors, all of which lead to a decline in life quality. In particular, it is necessary to take measures for the elderly since they often have difficulty with financial transactions and may be vulnerable to financial fraud. One of the most impressive measures was the Advance Designation of Representative Payee System of the United States. In this system, subscribers and recipients of the social security system designate in advance a person to manage their salary if they become unable to do it themselves. The system, which is a delegation contract under the Civil Act, differs from other general delegation contracts in that it is implemented under the initiative of the government or institution and a manager's commencing period of management is uniformly determined by the government or institution. How about broadening the scope of this system and introducing it as a system in designating a financial manager in case of an emergency for senior financial customers? It would be much more convenient and reassuring if a financial institution could inform me of the methods and procedures for appointing a manager and assist me in doing so in case I lose my mental ability due to dementia or other causes. With such a system, even if I have dementia I would not starve to death because I can't withdraw my savings. The problem is how to prevent managers from committing embezzlement, breach of trust, or violation of the fiduciary duty of due care. Who will monitor managers after their delegators lose mental capacity? Therefore, criteria and procedures for manager supervision should be prepared first to implement this system.

As I reviewed the system, I wondered who I could designate as my manager. Should I leave it to my children? Then to which of my children should I assign? Won't my kids dispute? Then should I leave it to my spouse? What if he gets dementia before I do? What would I do if he belatedly cheats on me after I get dementia? Whomever I designate, worries persist.

In the end, I am the one who has to look after myself. My grandfather's dementia caused anxiety about dementia in my whole family. We eat foods recommended in news articles for preventing dementia, and we carefully read studies on innovative dementia treatments. If we experience spells of forgetfulness, we self-check ourselves using an online dementia checklist and we tick next to a brain CT examination for our yearly health check-up.

But what if I got dementia despite all those efforts? There is nothing we can do. The only thing I can do is to love my family more, express myself more, and be happy, hoping they will not abandon me and continue to love me even after I get dementia.

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